Learn how to balance the grief load in your backpack

My first children's book. Available on Barnes & Noble. I'm pleased to announce that I have just published my first children's book, based loosely on our mixed breed (sometimes Tasmanian Devil) four-legged dog, Kona. This will be the first of five different adventures she embarks upon. I've often advocated that during your grief journey, journaling is helpful. Preserving memories of a loving pet, via writing a short story about them, is a great way (I've found) to cement the

Grief is not a process of the intellect — it is an experience of the heart. Sadhviji Bhagawati Saraswati reminds us that there is no “right way” to grieve, and that simply feeling what arises is essential for healing. The deceased is not to be judged; their life, choices, and impact are part of the story that shapes our own journey through loss. When someone dies, the air around their name changes. Voices lower. Rooms grow softer. Yet sometimes, even in the shadow

Grief has a way of changing the shape of time. I have learned that it can make ordinary days feel unfamiliar, as if the world kept moving while some part of me stayed behind. A song in the grocery store, an empty chair at the table, a phrase someone used to say—small things can suddenly carry the weight of an entire life. Loss does not simply remove a person from our lives; it rearranges the world around their absence. Because of this, the phrase “moving on” has never felt q

The death of a child can leave a parent or loved one with overwhelming guilt, even when they did nothing wrong. Guilt often shows up as “what if” thoughts—What if I had noticed sooner? What if I had made a different choice?—because the mind is trying to find control in something unbearably painful. A few things may help right now: Name the guilt without treating it as truth. “I’m having guilt thoughts” is different from “I am guilty.” Talk to someone who can hold this with

Meaningful Ways to Honor a Loved One Living memorials: Planting a tree, creating a garden, or establishing a wildflower patch can serve as a lasting tribute that grows over time, symbolizing life and remembrance. Charitable acts: Donating to a cause your loved one cared about, funding a scholarship, or volunteering in their name transforms grief into a lasting legacy. Creative tributes: Compile a memory book, photo album, or playlist that captures their personality and passio

Some words elicit a strong response, which could be either positive or negative. F**K is such a word. This article is not intended to promote or denounce its use. Rather, the intent is to put it into context as it relates to reacting to a grief laden situation. When to Use “Fuck” in the Context of Grief During times of grief, the term “fuck” can be utilized in ways that are intensely personal, emotionally laden, and reliant on context. Its suitability hinges on your relatio

For years, mental health professionals were surprised when standard therapies for depressed people did not work for prolonged grief, says M. Katherine Shear, M.D., founding director of the center at Columbia. Today, it’s clear that PGD differs not only from typical grief but also from depression and other mental health problems, she says. Under the DSM-5 definition, PGD can be diagnosed a year after a loss. Another authoritative source, the International Classification of Dis

Emotional and Physiological Benefits Crying during grief is a normal response that allows you to express intense emotions such as sadness, anger, guilt, or longing, which often accompany loss. Emotional tears contain stress hormones and other toxins and shedding them can help relieve emotional tension and reduce physiological stress. Crying also triggers the release of oxytocin and endorphins, which act as natural painkillers, dulling both emotional and physical pain while p

The idea that someone who has died is “watching” us from heaven is a comforting but not definitively supported by Scripture. While some Christians find comfort in the thought, the Bible does not clearly teach that departed believers are actively observing or judging our lives. Biblical perspective Hebrews 12:1 speaks of a “great cloud of witnesses” — people in heaven who have lived by faith. Many interpret this as spiritual encouragement, not literal watching. The “witness” r

Understanding Grief Grief is a deeply personal experience, and everyone processes it differently. It's essential to recognize that your friend may go through a range of emotions, including sadness, anger, confusion, and even numbness. Your role is to provide a safe space for them to express these feelings without judgment. Practical Ways to Support a Grieving Friend Be Present: Sometimes, just being there is enough. Sit with your friend, listen to their stori

Songs can feel like a bridge to the past, often bringing back memories of loved ones who have passed. This happens because music is deeply tied to emotional memory and the brain’s attachment systems. 1. Music activates emotional memory centers When a familiar song plays, it doesn’t just trigger a memory — it reactivates the emotional context of that moment. The amygdala processes the feelings you had, while the hippocampus recalls the setting, people, and events. This fusio

Experiencing grief is a natural response to loss, and it's perfectly okay to feel not okay during this process. Acknowledging Grief Grief is often misunderstood in our culture, which tends to treat it as a problem to be solved rather than an experience to be lived through. Megan Devine, in her book It’s OK That You’re Not OK, emphasizes that grief is simply love in its most painful form. She argues that it is essential to honor our grief rather than rush to "fix" it. This

This phrase is a metaphorical and compassionate gesture that acknowledges the shared nature of grief. It suggests that while your own heart may be broken, you are willing to share your own emotional pain temporarily — “lend you mine” — so that you can be present, supportive, and empathetic to the person who is grieving. In grief, people often feel isolated in their sorrow, and the speaker is offering a form of emotional solidarity. By saying they will “lend” their own heart

When a person loses someone, it can be difficult to know how to respond, let alone how to help them. There is no simple solution for bereavement and grief. While you are not able to take away another person’s pain, there are ways to offer comfort. Grief is different for every person — some say that is as unique a human fingerprint, and there is no correct way to grieve. These tips can help you to offer support while respecting a person’s grieving process. Start with the Basic

Grief and loss are very complicated topics that often bring up uncomfortable feelings. This discomfort often leads to avoiding addressing a loss and, instead, letting it be “the elephant in the room”. Further, it can be challenging to bring up the topic, and you may worry you might make someone else sad. However, it is always okay to share how you feel, especially regarding grief and loss. Sharing your feelings about sensitive topics can help build emotional resilience. Thus,

Grief is one of the most intense emotional experiences a person can face. It can shake the foundation of daily life and leave a person feeling lost and overwhelmed. For some, this pain leads to turning to substances as a way to cope. Understanding the connection between grief and substance abuse is crucial for those struggling and for those who want to support them. This post explores how grief can influence substance use, the risks involved, and ways to find hope and healing

A Personal Perspective: Grief is shaped by the person we loved and lost. Key points No two people grieve the same way. Comparing your grief to somebody else’s is not helpful. The pain is different for each person, but it’s still the worst pain, because it is yours. Grief is a lot of things. It’s a process. It comes in waves and it comes in stages. It’s relentless and can’t be controlled. It can last for months, years, or forever. It’s incredibly personal and yet universal. I